Friday, April 19, 2013

Go ahead and wait . . .

Proverbs 3:5-6--Trust in the Lord with all thine heart, and lean not on thine own understanding. In all your ways, acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your path.

Psalm 9:10--And they that know thy name will put their trust in thee: for thou, Lord, hast not forsaken them that seek thee. 
Psalm 13:5--But I have trusted in thy mercy; my heart shall rejoice in thy salvation.

Psalm 20:7--Some trust in chariots, and some in horses: but we will remember the name of the Lord our God.

John 14:11--Let not your hearts be troubled. Believe in God, believe also in me. 

While I can't go into a lot of details yet, there is a circumstance I'm in the middle of that is going to affect a lot of people no matter what is decided. I'm kind of partly in charge of this and partially responsible for the outcome. This morning I prayed that no matter what happens that God would be glorified. That I would be patient waiting for His answer (because at this point, it is out of my control. I'm waiting to hear back from the powers that be. I want to know what is happening--whether good or bad). I prayed that we would all be content with whatever God's will is. I thanked God for being in control. I asked God to show His will clearly so that we would know what He wanted us to do. I claimed this verse:

Psalm 112:7--He shall not be afraid of evil tidings: his heart is fixed, trusting in the LORD.

I felt like I gave it all to God. No matter what, I was going to trust that He knows best. I was going to be content with whatever happened. I was going to be patient--it didn't matter how long it took to hear back about everything, I was going to wait patiently. 

Isaiah 26:4--Trust ye in the Lord forever, for in the Lord Jehovah is everlasting strength. 

I didn't expect to hear an answer less than 2 hours later.

Mind you, it isn't finalized, but it is fairly certain.

One of the "powers-that-be" passed me on the sidewalk. He told me that it doesn't look good. Basically, there is nothing left that we can do. Short of a miracle, that is. I felt a rush of disappointment.

We worked so hard.
We thought of all possible options.
Talked to people.
Sent tons of emails.
Prayed really hard.
Begged God to work out everything according to His will. (But that His will would be the same as OUR will.)

God chose to do something different. As I was thinking about everything, I was reminded of what we prayed. I got honest with God. Asked Him to help make me
At peace.
That I would trust in Him no matter what. in any circumstance. I really meant it. 
ANY circumstance.
I wanted to trust God. I WANT to trust God.
And I'm learning. It's a hard lesson most of the time. But if God wants me to learn it, He's going to send me circumstances that are out of my control to see if I have learned. I keep failing. Over. And over. And over again. I fall. I freak out. i stress. Complain. But God keeps teaching me. And forgiving me.
Isaiah 26:3--Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee, because he trusteth in thee.

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